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Representing and supporting students to develop and achieve

Fran Storey - Student Disability Officer

12 THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER SAY TO SOMEONE WITH DEPRESSION

Have you tried eating better/sleeping less/exercising more/getting more light?

If depression could be cured that easily, nobody would suffer from it. Most people with depression have already tried everything in the book and more.

There's nothing to be upset about.

There's actually a lot in the world to be upset about; people with depression just spend more time aware of it.

There's no use dwelling on things.

You are correct; there's no use in having depression, just like there's no use in having diabetes-but here we all are.

Everything will be ok.

This fact hasn't escaped a depressed person's awareness, but things will still feel shitty right now.

What are you sad about?

Depression isn't really 'about' anything except a chemical imbalance. Depressed people feel bad about a lot of things, but these things didn't cause the depression.

You should get out and do something fun.

Depressed people usually lack energy and motivation to do things, its a case of once step forward and two steps back a lot of the time, your perspective of something fun will probably not correlate with a depressed person's perception.

You should be glad just to be able-bodied.

Depressed people would love to be happy about their physical abilities-or literally anything-but unfortunately they can't turn their mood on and off like a switch. And as an aside, it is offensive to disabled people to suggest that people should be happy not to be them.

You would feel better if you smiled more.

What people do with their face is not the business of anyone else, and yet again if beating depression was that easy them nobody would be depressed.

Don't cry.

With the exception of officers playing a role, most people-depressed or otherwise-don't intentionally cry. If you see someone cry you are probably seeing tears that they tried to fight back, so don't let them feel worse because their tears escaped.

There are people with much worse problems than you.

That is very true, but knowing that some people get third degree burns doesn't make first degree burns hurt any less.

You are not truely better, if you are relying on medication.

Being able to get out of bed every morning, function in a job and engage in social activities would be great for a person with depression to be able to do without psychiatric assistance. But taking a pill every night is way preferable to missing out on everything life has to offer.

Just cheer up.

You would never dream of telling somene with a cold to 'just stop coughing'. Depression is also a physical ailment beyond a person's control; the problem is just in their brains rather than in their throats.

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